Entitlement Schema

”[The entitlement schema] is likely to have been caused through indulgent parenting, parents who encourage beliefs of specialness above others with out appropriate limit setting.”

- Linden Clinical Psychology

What happens when we spoil kids too much? When we say things like ‘You deserved to win, you’re much better’ or ‘you’re the best’ or ‘you can have everything you want’.

It could be the ‘Entitlement Schema’.

This is where we grow up genuinely believing that we are superior to others, and deserve more recognition, attention, money etc. And while the word ‘entitled’ portrays a huge narcissist, it might just be any average person with unconscious ‘entitled’ thoughts.

Just simple ones like ‘I deserve that raise more than X’ or ‘I’m so much better than them’ can be elements of it.

So as much as we want to make each child/student/adult feel special, we need to remind them of a core message:

No one is better than you.

You are not better than anyone else.

The person next to you isn’t inherently ‘inferior’ or less important, even if you have skills that society deems more ‘valuable’.

At the end of the day we’re pack animals, relying on each other and working as a whole.