Are people 'gifted'?

Growing up, I was convinced that people were just gifted. 

Whether academics, singing, high jump or story writing… you were obviously born with it. 

My thinking started to shift when I read Dr Carol Dweck’s book “Mindset” a few years ago, which argues against this very thing. That instead, all these skills we associate as ‘fixed’ or ‘gifts’, are in fact malleable. That if we dedicate enough time with the right sort of practice, we can be as good as the ‘gifted’. Hence, emphasising to adopt a ‘growth mindset’, rather than a ‘fixed’ one.

So how does this apply to us as adults now? 

Umm… but prodigies?

Of course, we first need to address the Mozarts.

There are some among us who have achieved incredible things at an early age. It’s hard not to say that they’re ‘gifted’ with the skill of x. 

But here’s a quote from Dweck’s book:

“We like to think of our champions and idols as superheroes who were born different from us. We don’t like to think of them as relatively ordinary people who made themselves extraordinary.”

So I’ve started thinking of it this way:

The head starter kid

Let’s use music as an example:

1. We’re babies - babies are chill, they bite their own feet, they’re curious.

2. We’re toddlers - we’re sort of able to communicate. Our parents might’ve already played music constantly from when we’re young, we adopt a similar liking for music. We get positive reinforcement for smashing the keys on a keyboard. 

3. We’re children - we’re drawn to music, we play in our spare time. We get positive reinforcement for playing. We’re confident too, probably from people around us. This fuels our motivation to do more of it, and the cycle continues. 

FOR EXAMPLE: Emily bear

Currently 18 and has release her own albums, EPs, and has also won many composing awards. Made her professional piano debut at Ravinia festival, at age 5. A prodigy. 

Bear grew up with a mother who was a professional singer, and a grandma who was a piano teacher. At age 2, her grandma noticed her piano skills, who most likely mentored her. Obviously her grandma didn’t cause Emily to become a ‘prodigy’, but her consistent support and resources definitely helped Bear realise her potential in music. 

The true gift

While there are always exceptions to the rule, here’s what I believe. 

The true ‘gift’, is our confidence, motivation, curiosity and passion for a particular activity. The skill itself can be learnt - but it’s the perseverance and grit that creates a result. 

Bear obviously didn’t come out of the womb composing a sonata, but she most certainly had an intrinsic passion and affinity with music developed very early on. Most importantly, while having a musical family did help, it was her consistent dedication and hard work behind the scenes, that created her achievements. 

But anyway, less of this prodigy stuff, and more about how it relates to our current limiting beliefs. 

So to my actual point

There’s an idea that if you’re not gifted or talented in an area,  there’s no way you’ll be able to be thaaat good even if you tried.  

This fixed mindset is most prevalent in adults. When we’re children, we’re told we have plenty of time, and can develop skills to becoming great at something. But once we’re adults, we accept that we’ve already lost. That we somehow lose this belief that we can learn something exceptionally well, and instead say:

 ”oh, I’m not a ‘x’ person” 

“I’ve always been bad at this”

For example:

 I don’t consider myself a good drawer. Even now, when I attempt to draw, there’s not much I would be proud of showing. I’d say ‘I’m not good at drawing’, or ‘I can’t draw’. 

But what I actually mean is, ‘I can’t draw… in my current situation, because I don’t spend enough time practicing in my spare time, because I’d rather watch ‘Handmaid’s Tale’. 

I now know I am fully capable of whipping out a fantastic drawing, if I actually spent the time, energy and dedication required. 

I want to emphasise that nothing is fixed. It’s about combining the belief that we can learn with time, that our cup is never too full with the actual output of doing the hard work. 

Wrap up

So who cares if we didn’t get that head start early on? We can still take the dedication of a prodigy, or someone ‘gifted’ and begin now. I really believe there’s not much difference between our potential as children and now as adults. 

So it’s about putting in the consistent hard work, something not many of us want to, or can be bothered to do.

I’ll end with another quote from ‘Mindset’: 

“no matter what your ability is, effort is what ignites that ability and turns it into accomplishment.”